Thursday, May 30, 2013

Letter to 17-year-old Me.

I love me some country music.
I love me some Brad Paisley.
On the way home from work I was listening to said B. Paisley and on came his song "Letter to Me."
If you've never heard it...go do so.
It's great.
In it he writes a letter to his 17-yr-old self.
I've heard it lots of times before, but this time I started to think more about myself at 17.
And then I decided to follow Brad's lead and write to 17-yr-old Kaycie.

Hello Kaycie,
It's me...Kaycie.

(I'm starting to feel awkward.......
I'll finish it anyway.....)

Right now it's 2013 and oh how much will your life change from where it's currently at in 2004.
First things first: you're so beautiful with those big, brown eyes and thick, brown hair.
So since you are...QUIT plucking your eyebrows so dang thin and QUIT putting blonde highlights in your hair.  It looks bad.  So just stop.
You're not fat.  You're so far from fat it's ridiculous.  Quit comparing yourself to the twigs in your ballet class.  Your body was made for other styles of dance.
Enjoy being a size 5.  The birthing hips will come in your Freshman year.
Don't feel bad that you don't get asked to come to the school parties.  They DO NOT matter so keep enjoying your time at home with your parents on those Friday nights.
Be more thankful for the paradise you live in.  There are no beaches where you currently are!
Most of your friends will fade.  Keep spending quality time with them, but just don't think they will last forever.  The most important friendships will last.  
Which leads me to Katie Claire and Brittany.  Good thing you love them so much because they're not going anywhere.

Enjoy free room and board while you can.  Life starts handing you bills.
Your first kiss will be "meh" or "blah" or any other non exciting word you want to put there.
Your second kiss though...that'll be fun at the time.  So just enjoy.
Take some tumbling classes now.  You'll be a better hip hop teacher in the future for it.
Keep being honest with your parents.  You get more privileges that way.
Thankfully you already know this, but, keep being an example at school.  You will receive the kindest compliments in your yearbook and the nicest notes from your classmates expressing their appreciation for it.
When you get to college...soak in EVERY LAST BIT while you're there.  You're going to miss it more than you realize once you graduate.
Don't feel bad when you never get asked out at BYU.  I know, I's BYU...isn't it branded for that sort of thing?  One would think.  But you don't need any of the guys there romantically so it just doesn't matter.
Well...I guess I ruined that surprise.  Yes, you will get in to BYU!  All of your hard work will pay off.
Cutting your hair to your ears may sound like a good idea at the time.  But it's not.  I repeat.  IT'S NOT A GOOD IDEA!
I won't ruin all of college for you...but just be flexible.  Your college life will end up being far more fulfilling than you ever realize because of flexibility in your plans.
Besides all of're doing pretty good for a 17-yr-old!  Your life is actually quite fun, you go to a great school, you're happy & talented...consider yourself lucky.

Lastly, you're going to go through something hard.  So excruciatingly hard.  So hard that you'll wonder if you even still have a soul at times.  But if you stay close to the Lord you will get through it.  I promise.  You won't get through it quickly...but you'll find yourself triumphant on the other side and it will all make sense.
It will all make sense because Heavenly Father has an amazing life planned for you.
(Well...up to 26, but I'm sure it's planned out to be amazing beyond 26.)
He will bless you with someone far more loving and honorable than you ever could have imagined.
He will bless you with someone who will cherish you so so much.
He will bless you with someone who has the same life goals and will help you accomplish those goals.
I won't tell you his name, how you meet, how you fall in love, or what you're doing now...but just know you're in for quite a treat and you will thank Heavenly Father every day for blessing you so.

Enjoy Senior Year and eat as much Rita's Italian Ice as you can!
-2013 Kaycie

Monday, May 20, 2013

Grow Old With You

The other day at work I witnessed something that really made me so happy.
The campus I work at is currently building us a new school house so in the mornings right now we take the girls to the local community gym for PE.
Every so often the PE teacher lets the girls pick what they want to do for the week.
Some of my girls wanted to go swimming so off we went to the pool area.
There's always a fair amount of old people doing water aerobics or just walking up and down the length of the pool.
One of the pools is right across from this giant jacuzzi.
Towards the beginning of PE I had watched an older couple enter the pool deck together.
The man had gotten out of the pool and headed to the jacuzzi sooner than his wife.
She was taking a breather and was right by the little bit of deck between the pool and jacuzzi with her back turned away from her husband.
I just watched as his eyes lit up that his wife was nearby and then watched how his brain thought of how to get her attention.
So what does any boy do?
Splash water of course!
So for about 3 mins I watched his frail, little arms attempt time and time again to splash water on her.
Sometimes he couldn't even get it out of the jacuzzi.
Sometimes he only got the water 3 inches out.
Every so often he would finally get her, but she didn't even notice.
So...he'd try again.  And again.  And again.
Until she finally noticed, turned around, gave him a little scolding look that immediately turned in to a smile.
He smiled back at her.
And then off she went doing her exercises while he just watched her.
They looked a little something like this (except imagine swimming gear and a pool instead of clothes and a hammock...but you get the gist):

At first I was just happy I was able to watch that interaction from afar.
But then it really got me to thinking (in between telling my girls floating is not exercising so get goin' on those laps) how grateful I am to have someone to grow old with like that couple.
I'm fairly certain Alex and I will have similar interactions in 50+ years.
We already do annoying cute things to get each other's attention.
If I ever stopped tickling him when he least expects it...he'd miss it.
If he ever stopped curling up in my lap like a cat...I'd miss it.
(You can imagine how awesome it is for a 6'3" tall man to curl up in my lap.  This baby bump has made it even more interesting.)

I sure do love this man of mine and can only hope and pray that the life Heavenly Father has planned for us involves wrinkly skin, white hair, and hands clasped with Mr. Foster.

And just because you've probably already been singing this it is for your viewing pleasure:

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

A real life miracle

Not that I didn't already believe miracles can happen in our lives, but I know more than ever that miracles are real.
And to me and my growing family...this miracle is just as real as parting the Red Sea.

Alex and I went in for an ultrasound to check up on my placenta.
Obviously it's also a plus to see our little man!
We went in with the attitude that most likely the placenta had not moved from my cervix opening.
My doctor had just been very realistic and kept telling us at our check ups that the likelihood of it moving was slim to none.
In all of his years delivering babies (which is upwards of 35 years) he has rarely seen a complete placenta previa move.
So more or less we have just been praying that my body would be a good home for our son and that everything with my pregnancy would go as smooth as it could.

Well...we get in there and the nurse brings us back.
She squirted the warm goo on my belly and off we were to seeing the innards of my belly.
She went ahead and went straight to my cervix so that the baby could be more of the highlight of this visit.
She pointed out my cervix and as I'm looking at it I'm thinking, "There's nothing blocking it.  But maybe I'm seeing it wrong."
After studying it for a few seconds our nurse pointed out where my placenta was and it was NOT blocking my cervix!
It kind of had to sink in before I actually realized what she had said.
I could not believe it!
It felt like I was living in a dream and that I would wake up and she would actually tell me it had not moved.
But oh was it real!
She measured how far away it was and it was measuring 3 centimeters.
When delivering they want the placenta at least 2 centimeters away so not only had it moved from the opening, but it moved even further than expected!
I was just in shock the whole time, but more than anything I felt an overwhelming amount of gratitude.
I could not believe that I was one of the lucky few in this world that recovers from placenta previa.

She then of course showed us our baby boy.
His heart was beating just great, his blood vessels were bringing blood in and out, he had all of his toes...he's just this perfect little human.
His face is the cutest though...of course. :)
And he had his little hands crossed right underneath his chin.
Talk about break your heart!  He has already smitten us.

Afterwards my doctor called me when he got the ultrasound results.
He was dumbfounded.  He said he was really shocked and that someone up above must love me a lot.
He then told me I could live a normal life now and do everything I haven't been able to do!
It was such an amazing feeling to be released from being a prisoner within my own body!

More than anything it's amazing to not worry.
I had been doing a lot better with not worrying so much, but obviously it still crept in fairly frequently.
Within that next day I was able to run around with my niece, go on a walk, and just live care free.
So care free I decided to use my sister's stairs as a slide. (that one was not on purpose.)

I am so grateful for all of the family and friend prayers sent up above both in our homes and in the temples.
I know that was a huge part, if not the main part, of why my placenta moved.
Heavenly Father works in amazing ways and I'm so overwhelmingly blessed that He decided to work a miracle within me.
I suppose two miracles have happened within me since our little man is such a miracle in and of itself. 

Saturday, May 4, 2013

A little longing.

Just looking outside my window and seeing beautiful weather.
Then looking at this picture and wishing we could go do that.

 I try very hard not to complain...but daggum it, it's hard sometimes.
I miss not feeling so enclosed within my body.
For now I'll just lay in the grass and dream about the day when we can take the little man with us on such excursions.
(Alex carrying him up the whole way, of course.)

Now I look like this.
Quite drastically different.

Anyone willing to carry me up a mountain so I can see those views this summer?