Today was....off.

I said it.

Today was an off day.

And while I have a hard time posting this, I feel like mothers need support.

Mothers, espeically mothers of tiny people, need to know we're not the only ones out there that: 

Lose their cool.

Feel like bedtime is approaching like molasses. (AKA...reallllllly slow.)

Feel/Do embarrassing things.

So here I am...publishing my "off" day.

It didn't start out too off.

He woke up earlier than usual...so he lost about 45 mins of sleep there.

He was doing pretty good.

Didn't appreciate when the dog knocked him to the ground.

But that's understandable.

Most people wouldn't.

And then Papa punished his dog...so I guess we know the TRUE pecking order.

Kam wins. :)

But then after not being able to climb in the cat box and having the vacuum get put away (because those are really upsetting when you're 11 months)....it was nap time.

We are in transition.

That terrible transition from 2 naps to 1.

Not quite ready for 1.

Doesn't quite need 2.

And since he woke up so dang early, his nap

time was early as well.

I woke him up after 1.5 hrs so hopefully he would go back down for an afternoon nap.

This was him after nap...

All the cool kids read upside down.

A friend of my mother in law came over to see Kam and the new house.

He was a perfect angel for the guest...thank goodness.

Shortly after they went out to lunch he started saying, "ouch."

I stepped on the hot concrete and yelled, "ouch."

So for about an hour he kept saying over and over again: "ach, ach, ach, ach."

It was awesome.

It was right about now that all hell broke loose...slowly and painfully.

I could tell he was getting tired, but not tired enough.

So we went outside to get some stimulation.

As soon as I saw an eye rub and a yawn I raced back inside to get him down in what used to be the golden window for him to go down nicely.

That golden window has gone to trash.

So after being rocked and fed I set him in the crib and prayed he'd go down.

Nope.

10 mins later...

20 mins later...

30 mins later...

We've gone from whining to crying.

45 mins later...

We've gone to loud/aggressive crying.

55 mins later...

We've gone to screaming.

65 mins later...

75 mins later...

Still screaming.

I am not proud to admit that in this time I:

pinterested a lot.

screamed in to my pillow.

felt my heart break.

stormed up and down the hallway.

and of course...cried.

Angry to sad to ignore to really angry to really sad to really really angry.

WHY DOES THIS CHILD NOT WANT SLEEP?

I finally hit my breaking point.

I went in.

He, of course, acted all dramatic and fake coughed all over the place.

I picked him up and tried to cuddle him to sleep.

Yeah no...not happening.

Instead I got scratched in the face, head butted in the nose, and got ears full of screaming.

So after 20 mins of that I gave up and just plopped him on the ground.

To which he promptly yawned, rubbed his eyes, and laid his head on the ground.

And then started playing...crankily mind you.

Once I regained my cool, I hopped off the bed to be nearer to my 11 month old.

I was mentally and emotionally exhausted.  

This is how we ended up.

Still not asleep, but at least he wasn't moving or throwing a tantrum.

A few more hours of a rough, cranky baby and I was off to dance.

And what a welcome sight that dance studio was!

I felt all the stress leave my body.

(Of course he was fine for my mother in law.

Either that or he threw tantrums and she's just more patient than I am...haha.)

If you've made it this far...congratulations!

Why, you may ask, am I writing this super detailed post about a hard day?

Because.

It's necessary.

As I was texting some of my friends during this ordeal, I was so grateful to know they're fighting the same battles.

I was so grateful to know I'm not the only one who lets a little person get the best (errr...worst) of me.

I was so grateful for their support and friendship.

Us mothers...we have to stick together.

Because to those without kids...this seems like not a big deal.

I know how I felt before I had a baby.

"So he didn't take a nap...big whoop!"

"So he's cranky for a few days...he's a kid...who cares?"

But WE know why it's a big whoop and why it cares!

Because it makes us crazy!

Because it pulls out the worst side of us.

Because for some reason this tiny human makes our emotions run wild.

We become mothers we swore we'd never be.

And that's why I wrote this.

So hopefully one of y'all reading this will know you're not alone.

I've been loving this article that's been floating around on Facebook.

So even though I can't personally be there to help you out...hopefully this post does.

Cheers to those who've had a bad day!

Whether you're a mother or not...bad days suck.

So pat yourself on the back.

You made it through this day.

There's always tomorrow.

4th of July review

The 4th of July is one of my favorite days of the year.

I love the American flag.

I love patriotic music.

I love seeing the stars and stripes displayed in yards, windows, and clothing.

I love BBQs and watermelon.

I love feeling united with my fellow citizens as we all celebrate this being the home of the brave.

This year was so nice because I was able to actually have a 4th at home!

From 2007 until this year I haven't been able to have a "normal" 4th for a variety of reasons.

So this year we made it extra awesome.

First stop: the beach!

One of our ward families opened up their private beach for anyone from church to use.

So we spent the whole morning there looking for shells, digging in the sand, and splashing in the water!

After the kids took a nap we headed to our favorite pizza spot: Giuseppi's.

Then we went in to Shelter Cove Harbor because we knew it would get packed very quickly.

We hung around there looking at the vendors and listening to the musicians, until it was time to get on my dad's boat.

Things got a little rough around here.

Kameron didn't have a good nap and he was really hot and sweaty.

PLUS he's an 11 month old trying to crawl and climb on a boat that is not ideal for crawling and climbing.

But the trip still delivered us an awesome sunset, some dolphins, and of course some great fireworks to watch.

Until next year!

Thanks for being the land of the free, America!

11 month old Kameron!

Well...11 months has arrived.

It's so crazy to think about that just one year ago I was huge, drank Sonic Route 44 ice waters like it was my job, and sat in the kiddie pool section frequently.

And now here I am with an 11 month old baby.

He's sure a pretty cute baby. :)

Let's see...

This month Kameron has really gotten the hang of "driving." :)

He loves sitting the front seat of a car, his new car stroller, and was quite impressed with the golf cart while we were in Florida.

He just grabs the wheel, shifts it back and forth, and does this happy noise.

We all laugh every time because it's so funny.

His Grammie and Papa got him a sandbox, which has been fun.

I think right now he likes the process of getting in and out much more than actually playing in it...but whatever...

Someday he'll stay in it longer than 1 minute. :)

He pretty much will eat anything that isn't mushy.

So bananas and sweet potatoes are OUT.

His favorites are: goldfish, puffs, meat, broccoli, apples, squeezy fruits/veggies, and bread.

Oh...and Cheetos!

He had those on the 4th of July and kind of became obsessed.

I craved them my first trimester and ate...well...a lot of bags.

Just sayin...

He's starting to play and interact more, which has been fun.

He loves to play tag, peek a boo, pat a cake, and this game in his crib where he hides in the corner and laughs with delight when you tickle him.

His tantrums have hit a new level.

Not so awesome.

I seriously had no idea babies his age threw tantrums.

They should warn you.

And what's even more frustrating is that you can't reason with him.

You can just tell the poor kid is mad he can't communicate more effectively and is just upset.

He's started playing with his blocks more, which I LOVE.

He can stack 2-3 up.

He also is really great at putting the circle in the shape sorter.

This is his excited and frustrated face.

His eyes are how I can tell the difference.

He's becoming a little imitator and it definitely amuses us all!

I am proud to say: he loves the beach.

He likes the sand, he likes the sun, he likes the water...

It's awesome.

I can't wait until we can build sandcastles and play in the waves together.

He's still using his walker and cruises around from item to item.

He has started standing on his own now!

I know it's only a matter of time before those first steps come!

His favorite things to do are: read/flip through books, play in water, put phones up to his ear, climb, "drive," get tickled, go up and down stairs, and pull everything out of the cupboards/shelves/laundry basket.

I can't even believe our cub is 1 year in just 3 short weeks!

Even though he's transitioning into a toddler...he'll always be my baby.

Happy 11 months, Kam!

We love you.

You don't spank your best friend.

On our last (unexpected) evening on Hilton Head it rained.

A lot.

Like monstrous amounts of water dropped out of the clouds.

It was amazingly awesome.

I've missed a good Southern thunderstorm!

We were out at our favorite local seafood restaurant, Hudson's, when the heavens opened.

We all got soaked getting into the cars and then into the house.

Kameron laughed and thought it was quite the adventure.

We got him all dried off and down for a little nap.

I got bundled up in sweats (since my father keeps the house at like 50 degrees) and was hanging out with everyone in Krista's room.

I was swinging my niece, Laela, in the air.

(Again and again as per her request.)

Alex came by and swatted my bum.

Laela looked at him and said, "Hey!  Don't spank her!"

Alex said, "Why not?"

And that crazy, curly haired girl replied, "Because Kaycie is your best friend."

Krista and I looked at each other and all we could say was "ok...that was cute."

I just loved that a 3 year old could recognize how much Alex and I value each other and enjoy being with one another.

She saw that we have a special bond.

She saw that we are best friends.

Santa Catalina Island!

Well we did it.

Went on an actual vacation.

Sure, we've been lots of places...but I would definitely call those "trips."

But yes...an actual vacation, where there's no agenda or a billion things we're trying to do or lots of people we're trying to see, happened.

And since we haven't had a vacation since I was 9 weeks pregnant and felt slightly like death...it was a very welcome thing!

A few months ago we were by the pool (which is at the old house.  RIP pool.  You are missed. :( ) with our friends Matt & Glenna.  

They talked about Catalina and how great it was.

Alex had only been there for scout camp, but hadn't been to the other side of the island, where all the action is.

So we decided to all take a trip!

Thankfully they love Kameron so the thought of taking a trip with a baby doesn't turn them off. :)

So on Memorial Day we headed down to Long Beach to take the ferry out to Catalina!

It is about 26 miles from the mainland.

Kameron loved the rockin' and rollin' and thought the ferry was all around a pretty cool experience.

Us on the ferry about to reach the island!

A taxi was waiting to pick us up and take us to the condo we were going to be staying in.

Where we docked was the main city of Catalina, called Avalon.

There are approximately 4,000 residents and the majority of them live in Avalon.

However, around the bend and a mile or so away from the city is Hamilton Cove...which is where we stayed.

Hamilton Cove is its own little slice of pure heaven.

They have their own community complete with pool, hot tub, 18 hole putt putt course, fitness center, little beach, playground, and a croquet field.

This was the view from our balcony.

Sometimes I felt like I was in a mini Greece with how the buildings were set up.

Once we got our stuff all checked in, we headed into town so Matt could show us Avalon for a bit and then go grocery shopping.

90% of the vehicles you see on Catalina are golf carts.

Some cars, a few SUVs/trucks, some scooters and bikes...but mostly golf carts.

No traffic lights.

It was kind of amazing.

The golf cart that came with our condo was in the shop so for the first day and a half we had a rental.

It was pretty ghetto, but it was a good laugh!

After Kameron napped we went back into the city to walk along the waterfront and then just hung out at our place the rest of the evening.

The next day Kameron woke up SO early.

He apparently did not get the memo that we were on vacation and you're supposed to sleep in.

No...he decided to wake up an hour earlier than he usually does.

But oh well...how can you complain when he's really cute, gets excited when he sees you, and then you have the awesome view from your balcony.

Matt & Glenna went ziplining so the 3 of us went on a hike.

We golf carted our way up Avalon canyon and then hiked on through the botanical gardens to the Wrigley Memorial.

Yes...Wrigley.

Like the gum.  And the Chicago Cubs.

Our first night when I saw Cubs paraphernalia in the windows I was pretty confused to say the least.

BUT...the Wrigleys bought the island in the early 1900s and still own about 90% of it today.

The baseball team did spring training on the island from 1921-1951...pretty cool.

Anywho...we hiked to the memorial in their honor.

I LOVE the architecture on the island.

So much tile.

To die for.

We still had some time to kill before Matt & Glenna were done, so we decided to just drive around and explore Avalon some more.

So we did.

We found the gas station.

And boy am I glad gas is not that expensive in Santa Barbara!

 We stopped for a bit at "Lover's Cove" and watched the water crash against the rocks.

And we also saw these orange fish (whose name currently escapes me) swimming around in the coral nearby.

Kameron is so fascinated with the ocean.

Then we picked up Matt & Glenna from their ziplining excursion.

Matt told us our golf cart was ready to be picked up so we said "farewell" to the ghetto cart and said "oh hello" to our nice one.

That evening we played a round of putt putt.

Matt & Glenna keep track of their strokes.

Glenna & I do not.

Glenna attempted to golf one-handed while holding Kameron.

She did pretty well.

I tried it.

Not so good.

 Then for dinner the boys grilled up some dogs, which we ate on the balcony.

Kam loved the chili. :)

 Kameron did a little better the next morning and just woke up at his normal time.

Matt & Glenna were amazing and watched him for us so we could go on a ziplining date!

It. Was. Awesome.

If you ever can go...just do it.

For real.

This picture was right before our first zip!

I had to nervous pee right about now.

HELLO amazing view!

Our guides, Justin & Alaina, were so fun!

When Matt & Glenna picked us up we drove to the docks to rent a boat.

However, after getting 10 minutes out, Matt thought the top speed of our current boat was no bueno.

So back we went to trade it out for a faster one.

The afternoon out on the water was so amazing!

It definitely made me miss home.

I felt so bad for Kameron in his cumbersome life jacket.

He kept grabbing at it like, "WHAT IS THIS THING TRYING TO ATTACK MY HEAD?!"

But eventually he got interested enough in the wind and water and then even let the waves rock him to sleep.

While walking around I found a Dole Whip station!

They have them at Disneyland, but each time I go the line is SO long that I just cannot wait in it with Kameron.

So when I saw the sign in the window I about died!

I think I've hooked Glenna now. :)

That evening Glenna, Kam, and I hung out in the hot tub while Matt & Alex attempted to catch dinner off the pier.

Thankfully we had bought ribs and salmon as a backup...if you catch my drift. :)

At night Matt & Alex would go on "night cruises" in the golf cart.

On this particular night they saw lots of critters and even caught a picture of this Catalina fox!

Thursday came all to quickly!

I think Kameron was starting to get the vacation vibe and actually slept in...like 30 minutes!

Our little family went on a tour, while Matt & Glenna did...well...I don't really know what they did.  Haha

The tour took us all around Avalon and then up the back roads (which were V.E.R.Y. bumpy) to the Catalina airport.

We saw 28 buffalo along the way!

Buffalo are not native.  Haha

BUT...they were brought over for a movie in the 30s and then have just been there ever since.

Here we are at the airport. 

Which is where we got Alex some buffalo jerky and Kameron a stuffed buffalo.

On the way back down to Avalon we had a fox sighting!!

I was SO happy to see one too!

It was adorable!

SO cool that the church is here too...on the tiny island. :)

We spent the afternoon on a rented boat with Matt & Glenna again.

I have no pictures from that particular trip...but it was great!

We saw wild sea lions playing in the water!

They were pretty close too!

I was so excited!!!

Then that evening we had our one meal out.

We all ate yummy yummy fish and enjoyed the harbor at sunset.

(The fish was so yummy, it was even baby approved. :)

And like all vacations do...they come to an end. :(

We spent the morning packing up.

We had a few hours to kill between checking out and when the ferry left, so we just hung around the harbor and enjoyed our last little bit in Avalon.

See?  Even Kameron's unhappy about leaving.

Leaving Catalina. :(

I am SO glad we took this vacation!

We definitely needed it.

It was fun to spend time as a family and with our friends.

Matt & Glenna were great!

They never once thought Kameron was cramping their style...or at least didn't let it show. ;)

I hope to go back again!