Thursday, July 24, 2014


I said it.
Today was an off day.
And while I have a hard time posting this, I feel like mothers need support.
Mothers, espeically mothers of tiny people, need to know we're not the only ones out there that: 
Lose their cool.
Feel like bedtime is approaching like molasses. (AKA...reallllllly slow.)
Feel/Do embarrassing things.
So here I am...publishing my "off" day.

It didn't start out too off.
He woke up earlier than he lost about 45 mins of sleep there.
He was doing pretty good.
Didn't appreciate when the dog knocked him to the ground.
But that's understandable.
Most people wouldn't.
And then Papa punished his I guess we know the TRUE pecking order.
Kam wins. :)
But then after not being able to climb in the cat box and having the vacuum get put away (because those are really upsetting when you're 11 months) was nap time.
We are in transition.
That terrible transition from 2 naps to 1.
Not quite ready for 1.
Doesn't quite need 2.
And since he woke up so dang early, his nap
time was early as well.
I woke him up after 1.5 hrs so hopefully he would go back down for an afternoon nap.

This was him after nap...
All the cool kids read upside down.

A friend of my mother in law came over to see Kam and the new house.
He was a perfect angel for the guest...thank goodness.
Shortly after they went out to lunch he started saying, "ouch."
I stepped on the hot concrete and yelled, "ouch."
So for about an hour he kept saying over and over again: "ach, ach, ach, ach."
It was awesome.

It was right about now that all hell broke loose...slowly and painfully.
I could tell he was getting tired, but not tired enough.
So we went outside to get some stimulation.
As soon as I saw an eye rub and a yawn I raced back inside to get him down in what used to be the golden window for him to go down nicely.
That golden window has gone to trash.
So after being rocked and fed I set him in the crib and prayed he'd go down.

10 mins later...
20 mins later...
30 mins later...
We've gone from whining to crying.
45 mins later...
We've gone to loud/aggressive crying.
55 mins later...
We've gone to screaming.
65 mins later...
75 mins later...
Still screaming.

I am not proud to admit that in this time I:
pinterested a lot.
screamed in to my pillow.
felt my heart break.
stormed up and down the hallway.
and of course...cried.
Angry to sad to ignore to really angry to really sad to really really angry.

I finally hit my breaking point.
I went in.
He, of course, acted all dramatic and fake coughed all over the place.
I picked him up and tried to cuddle him to sleep.
Yeah no...not happening.
Instead I got scratched in the face, head butted in the nose, and got ears full of screaming.
So after 20 mins of that I gave up and just plopped him on the ground.
To which he promptly yawned, rubbed his eyes, and laid his head on the ground.
And then started playing...crankily mind you.

Once I regained my cool, I hopped off the bed to be nearer to my 11 month old.
I was mentally and emotionally exhausted.  
This is how we ended up.

Still not asleep, but at least he wasn't moving or throwing a tantrum.
A few more hours of a rough, cranky baby and I was off to dance.
And what a welcome sight that dance studio was!
I felt all the stress leave my body.
(Of course he was fine for my mother in law.
Either that or he threw tantrums and she's just more patient than I am...haha.)

If you've made it this far...congratulations!
Why, you may ask, am I writing this super detailed post about a hard day?
It's necessary.
As I was texting some of my friends during this ordeal, I was so grateful to know they're fighting the same battles.
I was so grateful to know I'm not the only one who lets a little person get the best (errr...worst) of me.
I was so grateful for their support and friendship.
Us mothers...we have to stick together.
Because to those without kids...this seems like not a big deal.
I know how I felt before I had a baby.
"So he didn't take a nap...big whoop!"
"So he's cranky for a few days...he's a kid...who cares?"
But WE know why it's a big whoop and why it cares!
Because it makes us crazy!
Because it pulls out the worst side of us.
Because for some reason this tiny human makes our emotions run wild.
We become mothers we swore we'd never be.
And that's why I wrote this.
So hopefully one of y'all reading this will know you're not alone.

I've been loving this article that's been floating around on Facebook.
So even though I can't personally be there to help you out...hopefully this post does.
Cheers to those who've had a bad day!
Whether you're a mother or not...bad days suck.
So pat yourself on the back.
You made it through this day.
There's always tomorrow.


krista said...

I love that last photo. I think you should frame it. And I think you're a good mama bear to your cub. A really good mama, in fact. Also, I love you. And I love him. xxx and hopes for a better day today!