Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Seasons

Do you ever feel like you can't keep up?
Do you ever feel like you're not doing enough?
Do you ever feel like you're a failure at being a female and doing the "female" things?

I KNOW I am not alone in those feelings.

I feel like I constantly get down on myself for not "doing" enough.
The world demands a lot from us.
We are "supposed" to have an always clean house, dinner for our family 7 nights a week, fully stocked food cabinets, constant laundry loads going, never have pee spots on the side of the toilet (from your husband obviously), and all while looking practically perfect in every way. 
Mary Poppins, anyone?

Some of us at church were expressing these feelings of not having enough time to do everything and then we had a lesson on Family History.
Then my mind spiral started again.
"I KNOW family history is important.
I KNOW it is.
But how in the world am I supposed to research to find my ancestors and then prepare them for temple work all while I have a young child?"

While my mind was getting severely overwhelmed, my Bishop's wife chimed in and said something along these lines:
"We all have seasons in life and we cannot forget which season we are in.  If we can remember to stay within the confines of our season, we can avoid feeling bogged down."
Then she told us that family history has to match our season.
For my season as a young mother that looks like taking pictures and writing in a journal.
HALLELUJAH!  I'm already doing that!
I felt such relief!
I felt so liberated!

Even though that was a few months ago, I've really tried to keep that phrase in mind.
Whenever I start to feel like I want to do it all, but don't have the time or means, I repeat in my mind: "It's not my season."
I have to remember my current season.
I cannot expect myself to be able to do things now that I will be able to do when I no longer have newborns or when we are empty nesters.
This doesn't mean that I'm incapable.
It means I very much am a capable person, but it's just not my season.
Don't you love that?!
I know for me it gave me a sense of freedom within myself.
I hope someone reading this will feel the same.
This world today makes us feel like we have to do it ALL in order to be happy.
And that's so false.

So let's stick to our seasons and enjoy the journey! 

1 comments:

krista said...

People would ask me how you were doing after Kam was born and I'd say, "It's amazing. It's like she was born to be his mother. She's a natural." And you are. You're absolutely incredible and I'm so proud of you. He's a lucky baby to have been born into yours and Alex's family. xo